Just as I was cramming my mouth with another obesity-enhancing cheese 'n' mesquita-flavour kettle chip, preparatory to washing it down with a draught of life-giving milk chocolate, the phone rang.
Whoaah! said my mole on the House of Commons health select committee. What are you writing about for your Telegraph column? I'm doing an elegy for Tracey Emin's bed, I said, crunching vigorously, and I meant it, since I am full of admiration for Charles Saatchi and what he has done for BritArt.
Too bad, said my source. It'll have to wait. We've got some fantastic stuff here from these health-conscious MPs. And, boy, was he right. There used to be a saying that no politician ever attacked motherhood...
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